7 signs of an abusive friendship
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If you are in abusive relationship
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ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP
when people talk about abusive relationships, they usually think about their parents or a romantic partner.
However, being in an abusive friendship is just as real and just as serious a struggle.
And it's unfortunately one that's often overlooked by many.
Abuse can be difficult to recognize when it's coming from a friend as it can easily be executed as a bit of good natured teasing or tough love.
With that being said,here are seven warning signs
7 WARNING SIGNS YOU MAY BE IN AN ABUSIVE FRIENDSHIP.
1.They intimidate you.
Do you have a friend who's constantly intimidating you Just to get there with you?
Studies show that intimidation is one of the most common tactics of emotional abuse.
By intimidating you, they are trying to assert their dominance over you and keep you in line.
They may do this by insulting you, humiliating you, threatening you, blaming you, or out doing you to make you feel inferior to them.
As much as you want to speak out and confront them about it, you are afraid it will only make things worse or that you won't be able to fight back against them. You may feel guilty for upsetting them, ashamed that you have been a bad friend to them, and angry at yourself for not being able to stand up to them.
2. I don't respect you.
Does your friend borrow your things without asking for permission and conveniently forget to return them or demand that you adjust your schedule to fit theirs, but then ditch you the moment someone or something more interesting comes along ?
If you answered yes, your so-called friend may say that they love and care about you, but in reality, they don't respect you.
As seen in studies conducted by researchers Dr. Meyer and Dr. Coulter, when your friendship lacks the basic and fundamental element of mutual respect, it can quickly turn toxic.
They may belittle your opinions, your beliefs, your choices, and your preferences.
Your voice doesn't matter to them and can't be bothered to care about your feelings either.
3. They don't listen to you
Does your friend make you feel ignored or invisible all the time?
Do they often dismiss your opinion without so much as a second thought or disregard what you have to say?
A lack of open communication and understanding is another very telling sign of your dysfunctional friendship.
They never take anything you say seriously.
They hardly ever ask what you think or how you feel about something.
And they don't value your perspective or your ideas. Your communication is largely one-sided.
They expect you to listen to them, even though they never do the same for you.
And it shows a glaring lack of empathy, respect, and consideration on their part.
4. They don't show remorse.
Your friend rarely apologizes when they have done something wrong.
But in the few times that they do, it always feels insincere and not genuine. They are not afraid to break your things, betray your trust, or hurt your feelings because they think that one simple sorry will fix everything. And they think that they can just get away with anything as long as they apologize for it afterwards. So pressure you into forgiving them. They may say things like can't you just get over it or sorry, I didn't think it was a big deal.
But the moment you do get over it and accept their apology, they just do it all over again. If this is the case, it's because they were never really sorry in the first place.
5. They are overly possessive of you.
Does your friend want you to be their friend and their friend only. They get angry with you for spending too much time with anyone else and don't want you hanging out with someone else when they are not there. They don't give you the space that you need sometimes. They keep you away from other important people in your life because they are jealous and afraid of being abandoned by you. No matter how much you assure them that that's never gonna happen, they just won't let go of you. Possessiveness may seem flattering but it is not healthy.
6. They are overly dependent on you.
Does your friend always depend on you to help them out of a tough situation or clean up the mess they have made, regardless of whether you have things to take care of in your own life?
The rope you into all of their need less drama and want to keep you at their beck and call 24/7. Studies show that codependency is an unhealthy friendship dynamic and it often leads to a damaged sense of Identity, lingering resentment, and self destructive tendencies. They selfishly take up most of your time, energy and attention. They ask you to attend all their needs but never once think about yours.
7. They can't be trusted.
Finally, your friend can't be trusted at all.
You have caught them lying more than once and always try to talk their way out of it by gaslighting you. They may say things like, oh, you must have misunderstood. or maybe I don't remember that.
They break their promises, gossip about you, and share your secrets to other people. They have no problem taking advantage of you or sabotaging your chances of success if it means they can get ahead.
Do you relate to any of these signs mentioned here?
Do you think you might be the victim of an abusive friendship?
Let us know in the comments below.
Being in an abusive relationship with a close friend is hard to come to terms with because most of the time they don't start out that way. Know when enough is enough and do what is best for you and your mental health. Even if it means leaving your former friend behind. If you found this blog helpful, be sure to like and share it with someone who might benefit from it, too.
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